I apologize for being away so long. My son and I have been really sick. He missed two weeks of school due to us both coming down with a horrible case of pneumonia. Today I’m just finally started to feel slightly better. We were both stuck in bed for two weeks. I never meant to fall so behind on my blogging, I just couldn’t seem to get up.

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Ryan’s home sick again. Yesterday he slept all day. He has a fever for some reason and an upset stomach. If it doesn’t go away by tomorrow I’m bringing him to the doctor. It isn’t like Ryan to stay in bed all day… ever.

It sucks that he had to miss school today. He’s already missed a lot this year. His teacher is going to be pissed. I didn’t want to send him and have him get everyone else sick though.

Last night I barely got any sleep. I was really worried about him. Every time I did manage to fall asleep he woke me right up by being so restless. Blah. I hope his fever goes away tonight.

This past Christmas I updated about how I wanted to order some holiday photo cards with pictures of my son to send out to friends and family. With all the holiday company I had this past holiday season I never ended up getting them done. This year I’m going to get them printed out early at doodlebugdezigns.com. Their cards are really cute. I love the designs and how easy it is to use their website. I was telling my friend earlier that they do birth announcements too. She wants some cute birth announcements when she has her baby in May. If they come out really good I’ll get my wedding invitations done there as well. I’ve been looking for a place to order them!

As a lot of you know the main reason I haven’t been online much lately is computer problems. My computer has been horrible. I even got two brand new Hard Drives and a brand new RAID controller and it’s still slow and freezing on me. That’s with 4 GIGs of RAM. It drives me crazy trying to blog or play games when my computers lagging and freezing. Even checking my mail is annoying. Not to mention how long it takes to reboot. When I first got this computer I could reboot in less than ten seconds. Now.. even with reformatting and upgrading everything it takes forever!

I’ve been looking around online for ways to make my computer faster. Obviously new Hardware isn’t helping it at all. I have replaced pretty much everything I can. So I’ve been searching for software that can help speed up my computer. Especially something that can fix error messages and stop my computer from locking up and crashing. I’ve been getting a lot of different kinds of errors but mostly Windows Explorer errors. Disc checking fixes errors but then they come right back on reboot!

jv16 PowerTools 2009 seems like exactly what I need. It looks like it does everything I’m looking for. I want something that can clean out my computer more thoroughly than just defragmenting alone. And something that can fix errors more reliably than simple disc checking. It also cleans out Windows registry which should stop my startup errors. I’m also happy to read about the feature that recovers deleted files. Last week I accidently deleted my txt with all my saved passwords. Hopefully it will help me get that back. I’m downloading the free scan right now. I’ll probably buy the whole thing later today. It’s the best product I’ve seen for this so far. A lot of products out there that claim the same things are just scams that infect your computer with malicious spyware. This product is definitely legit.

Last night I woke up to a voicemail from Chris. He was back in Cali like I feared. I guess he contacted MJ’s friend and the guy drove him back there. I called him back and pretty much flipped out yelling and crying. I told him he and her are no longer welcome to be in any part of Ryan’s life.

As Angela and Daniel pointed out that probably isn’t the best choice. Ryan will only hate and resent me if I don’t allow him to talk to his Dad. I just don’t know how to protect him from this. The other night he said his dream was coming true because his Dad was moving back here. Now he isn’t and Ryan’s let down once again. This morning he asked me if I found Chris yet and when I told him he stuck his head in the pillow and cried. I cheered him up by telling him I was giving him all of the WOW gold Chris had sent me to hold for him until he got back. I told Ryan I’m giving it to him instead to spend on anything he wants.

Chris really let Ryan down. I’m so angry at him. He also let everyone else down as well. All the people who tried to make him coming back as easy as possible for him. His friends and family he offered jobs in the company he was starting, his brother even moved into the smaller room so Chris could have the bigger one. His aunt sent him a phone for his bus ride, Kevin was going to pick him up. Logan was going to help him start the company. I was hoping that since I’d have help with Ryan I could finally finish school. Once again that was derailed by Chris.

Chris was my best friend for a long time. I too was really happy about him coming back. That’s going to change though. I can’t do this anymore. Maybe I can’t tell Ryan he can’t talk to his Dad but I don’t have to talk to him. And I don’t have to hang out with him and MJ when they visit or allow them in my home. I already deleted his number from my phone and removed them both on myspace.